Peer pressure is something that we all experience in life and it is something that can easily shape our teenage years for better or for worse. When I was a teenager, I couldn't help comparing myself to others and I still do it now to a certain extent when I feel down or annoyed. Does it ever really change? Do we eventually leave it behind or is peer pressure something that stays with us for many years as a simmering insecurity that raises its ugly head whenever we have a bad day? Calling all teens out there - you are not alone!
*So - Why do we Compare Ourselves to Others?:
We learn about the world from what we see. From a very young age, we learn the difference from right and wrong, what is accepted and what is not, how we should behave and so on and so forth. With the guidance of our parents, we eventually begin to understand ourselves through the image the world presents to us. Who am I? Where do I fit into all of this? Am I doing the right things? Am I good enough? What can I do to become accepted? The pressure to fit in and to be accepted is enormous and it doesn't always get easier as we get older depending on what our underlying insecurities are. So, what do we do? We imitate the actions of others who we think encapsulate the working definition of what it means to be successful.
* Dealing with Insecurity:
Everyone has their own way of dealing with negative feelings and not all of it is healthy or advisable. Drinking and taking drugs for instance will give you a great high while you are doing it but the feelings that hit you while you are lying in bed the next morning with a hangover from hell will do very little to boost your 'feel good' factor and your self-esteem. It is important to deal with any problems that are causing concern as soon as possible before they have a chance to negatively impact other areas of your life. Ask yourself why you feel insecure. You may find it easier writing your thoughts in a journal as it is a great way of expressing feelings which may be quite difficult to vocalise. More often than not, negative feelings and depression can also be effectively dealt with by exercise so join a gym and get on that treadmill! You will not regret it. You will be surprised at how quickly your mood improves, not to mention your confidence.
*Remember your Individuality:
You have lots to offer! We tend to forget this fact when we compare ourselves to other people. Remember - other people are continually comparing themselves to you! (You just don't hear about it). If you are struggling to fit in and having a hard time dealing with peer presure, you should remember that not everyone can fit in with the accepted stereotype. If you are different, celebrate your difference and be glad that you are not the same as everyone else. It would be a dull world indeed if we were all the same. Being an indiviudal is not always a smooth road but it is a very worthwhile one. Never compromise who you are just to fit in with some people who lets face it, you'll probably never see again. Life changes all the time and people move on. Make sure you move on too and set your sights on having as many experiences as possible.
*Make the Most of your Talents:
Do what makes you happy. Simple but true. That will take you far in life if you do the things that naturally bring you happiness. You would be surprised at how many people don't do the things that make them truly happy. If you enjoy it, don't give it up because it is a part of who you are. Many people follow the advice of others when it comes to making a career choice but that always isn't the right thing to do. You know yourself better than anyone else. Why settle for less than you deserve when it comes to creative and personal fulfillment? You deserve to be happy and to live a life that makes you feel content and satisfied with yourself. If you want to do something, then do it. Don't allow yourself to be put off and don't follow the crowd. Enjoy your youth and remember - be who you are!
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